Week 42: Tuesday
I have now been on this treatment for 42 weeks. It was just over a year ago I took on board my consultant’s advice to start the treatment and just over three years ago I was diagnosed with hepatitis C. What changes there have been to my life in this time.
Three years ago my day would have been buzzing with activity. I thrived on working in several organisations simultaneously on change management projects, trouble-shooting assignments, consultancy to groups, executive coaching, management investigations, and expert witness assignments in complex family law cases in the Royal Courts of Justice. And then there was my counselling therapy practice as well. So there would be meetings in various places throughout the day, hours travelling around, lengthy reports to be written, staff groups to work with, loads of information to absorb, metabolise and work with, as well as keeping track of various individuals therapy issues and progress. Very stimulating and rewarding.
Well, I say I thrived on it. But my liver didn’t. The stress of all this was taking its toll and I experienced the symptoms that I can now see related to hepatitis C – digestive pains, various aches and pains, skin rashes and a growing sense that all was not well. And alcohol was a regular ‘soother’ at the end of a long day.
By contrast, my day today has been spent meditating and doing a few minutes of yoga, washing up dishes, going to the supermarket, helping with the lunch, enjoying a cup of coffee with Carol and sitting in the sun for a few minutes. Later this afternoon I will do a ‘half day’ of counselling sessions. By the end of the day I will probably be as tired as I used to be doing a ‘busy’ day.
Yes, that’s life on treatment especially at week 42. It does lead me to wonder about life after treatment. Will I want to return to that pace and level of work stress? I do miss the buzz – but not the pressure and strain on my health. I have changed considerably over this time and it is both exciting and worrying to think about how these changes will impact on what work I will want to do in the future. In the meantime I can only begin to mull it over and ‘wait and see’.
August 24th, 2005 at 2:25 pm
Hi Ron,
I was going to say that it amazes me to think that you are week 42 yet this is not true. The memory of starting treatment 36 weeks ago is a very stark one and I remember reading your blog during the time when you were at week 2 and I was just preparing and thinking how long it was going to take to do this. On the other hand it does seem like time has flown by, I remember in January wondering if I would get to the end and now I find it hard to remember what it was like on treatment.
When I was on treatment I thought that I would change my life at the end of it in the end I realised that I enjoyed the life I had and fell back into it. Whether you go back to your stressful buzzing pre-treatment existence or continue in your now Zen like state is up to. I actually believe that treatment is the most stressful thing I have ever done and work related stress now just washes over me, after what we have been through very little is so significant that it is worth stressing about.
Take care
Jonathan
August 27th, 2005 at 3:29 pm
Hi Ron,
Am in agreement with Jonathan on several points - although I thought life would perhaps be altered for ever by treatment, it’s clear that I am me and my life is not terrifically twisted about in the aftermath. Moving quickly once again. However, there are hugely positive things that I’ve been blessed with resulting from this experience: that life is a tremendous gift that should be appreciated, that people are exceptionally special (in all ways!), that pathways are interconnected, that I am happy, that I am fortunate. These things must impact on how life is lived and thus, there are changes, even if small.
You will find the balance that works for you, as we all try to. How wonderful to finally be looking at “life after treatment” and considering how it will unfold. Hope that the final weeks pass quickly and painlessly!
Sue
August 27th, 2005 at 11:48 pm
Hi Ron,
I can relate to Jonathan’s comments very much, it seems so long ago that this all began and I find it inspiring that you’ve acheived so much. Since i’ve started treatment i’ve thanked my blessings that I was ‘fortunate’ to be type 3, I don’t think I am strong willed enough to have had to do this for 48 weeks. Not only have I found your blog inspiring but the forum has been a reminder that there are others out there in the same position as we are and i’m sure it will be a great legacy of your time on treatment for many years to come.
I hope the last few weeks pass by quickly, we’re almost there!
Stay well
Alan
August 31st, 2005 at 2:35 am
42 weeks!! Wow!! That is such an achievement. Similar to Alan, (Hi Alan) I also feel that I would be unlikely to face 48 weeks and am so grateful to be type 3 because although tx is manageable, sometimes its very hard. As you well know. I hope for you both Ron and Alan that your last few weeks pass very quickly and easily. I feel like I say this a lot, but I have such respect for people who have to undergo 48 weeks (and that is not to undermine people’s experience for 24 weeks) on the contrary - it makes me more aware of the achievement 48 weeks is!!
Am only 8 weeks into tx and already have such a strong sense of how much of a life-changing experience this is. And already wonder what post-tx is going to bring.
Whatever choices you make Ron when you are feeling suitably recovered post-tx, I wish yourself and Carol all the best and thank you again for providing so many of us a space within the Forum, where we can take comfort, share our experiences, compare notes, and have a good old fashioned moan if necessary!!
Over the past wee while that I have been a member, I have watched the number of members steadily increase and I suspect that will continue to be the case for some time to come!!
All the best.
xxx:)